techniques hosts use to persuade their guests to eat prodigious quantities of food

guilt trip the guilt trip serves as most people's introduction to forced-gluttony. this technique comes in many forms and is probably the most commonly-used technique. the underlying concept is if you stop eating, you are insinuating that you don't like what i prepared or purchased. irrespective of anything you say, it is your over-consumption and over-consumption alone that serves as a testament of your true feelings.

  • "why not, you don't like my cooking?"
  • "i spent so much time preparing it"
  • "when i was your age, i ate everything put in front of me"
  • "anything you leave, i will have to throw away"
kind request inebriation
shock and awe humor
respect/etiquette conspiracy
culture body language
history morality
lineage metaphysical
request for opinion competitiveness
compliments insult
bribe nagging
trade off connection
compromise peer pressure
physical char. imperative
temporal char. threat
need duress
preemptive strike forced feeding
trickery timing
chemical the future...

i have relatives that live in croatia, slovakia, hungary and israel and it is of utmost importance that their guests consume massive quantities of food. these hosts seem to feel personally insulted if you do not eat three, four or even five portions of the food that they are offering. initially i was critical of this forced-gluttony, but after reassessing the phenomena, i have become a connoisseur of their brilliant methodologies. my analysis of their techniques is intended to serve as the first step in the process of developing an effective counter-strategy.

although someone who eats large amounts of food on their own accord is the ultimate guest, those guests who succumb to these techniques generate a surprising level of joy for the host.

i have also not noticed a significant difference between the consumption of food that was prepared or purchased. one might think that a host would take more offense if food they slaved over was 'under-consumed'. it seems however, that the labor involved is not critical - all that matters is that massive quantities are ingested.